Why "Being Yourself" Is Impeding Your Growth

We have always heard statements such as "be yourself" or "you have to be yourself" throughout our lives. However, there is a downside to "being yourself" that no one discusses.

Depending on your upbringing and your environment, you adopt habits and behaviours that either propel your growth or stagnate you.

When you are being yourself, you are essentially exhibiting behaviours you have learned and developed from your environment. You are displaying actions that have been influenced and primed on you. You then grow with those and accept them as the way and the truth.

At times, you may possess and display the worst thought patterns, attitudes, and behaviours, and then justify them by claiming "this is who I am", irrespective of how you are perceived and how you relate to others.

There's a difference between being your true self and exhibiting behaviours which have been imposed upon you, intentionally or otherwise.

There are always socially acceptable ways and behaviours which are standard across different cultures. When you act opposite to those, you unknowingly model yourself not to be accepted into different social, even professional circles.

A person may illtreat others and lack empathy, then justify himself by claiming "this is who I am". Another may exhibit socially unacceptable behaviours and claim, "I'm being true to myself".

When you act and behave contradictory to what is socially deemed okay or good, you inevitably limit your growth opportunities. People will distance and dissociate themselves from you purely based on your unappreciative acts and behaviours that you claim "you are being yourself".

Before we begin to "be ourselves", we have to be conscious that we exist in communal settings and therefore there are unwritten rules of how we speak, act, and behave in our social environments. Rules that we need to follow to live harmoniously.

When you are reprimanded or guided on how to act, refrain from automatically justifying your actions as "but this is how I am", and observe the socially acceptable ways. This is not to say be a follower and do everything others do. But be observant and critical of how you relate to others.

So, before you claim people hate you, or choose to offer opportunities to others and not you, it is wise to introspect on how you relate and act to those around you. It starts in your immediate family. The more you think, "this is who I am", think twice and critically about whether being yourself is advancing or impeding your growth. Because probability is, "being yourself" is what may be hindering or delaying your prospective success and growth.