Why Love Bombing Is The Pitfall You Should Avoid

Compliments are generally seen as a good gesture, and some people end up always expecting a compliment in some form or shape. If they do not receive a compliment, it may be for the way they have dressed, about their new hair, a new material possession, or anything they deem important. They get disappointed and upset.

But there exist love bombers who will always play into the hands of such individuals. Before they know it, they have been manipulated and at times controlled by the love bomber due to their desire for affection and endearment.

In simple terms, Love Bombing is a form of psychological and emotional abuse often disguised as excessive flattery. It is an overly affectionate behaviour in which one party “bombs” the other with over-the-top displays of adoration and attention. This behaviour usually involves excessive flattery and praise, as well as showering the other person with unnecessary or unwanted gifts.

Love bombing typically occurs in romantic relationships, particularly during the early stages of the relationship. However, it can also occur between friends and family members. Whether internationally or not, it is considered a deliberate and manipulative tactic that is deployed to gain the upper hand over a new partner and increase his or her dependence on the bomber.

The more you have insecurities and a low sense of self-worth, the more likely you are to fall into this manipulative tactic by a person who, in future, will likely control you.

We see this in females who are in romantic relationships with love bombers. At first, they find it cute and admirable as they receive unending compliments and gifts. Not realising that the overall aim of the love bomber is to make them dependent on them, and eventually psychologically and emotionally controlled.

The same applies in family and friendships. Your friend may overly give you praise and compliments so they can earn your trust. They create some form of indebtedness where you feel you always have to be there for them, or your life will be nothing without them. Before you know it, they want you to only be friends with them, they get upset when they don't know certain aspects of your life, or they berate you for doing things without them.

To the victim, such behaviours are seen as warranted because they feel, "my friend has always been there for me" or "my friend has done this and that for me". Unknowing that they have been manipulated over time, and now they are being controlled, both psychologically and emotionally.

Such abusive and manipulative behaviours are hard to detect, as we expect people to generally care and be genuine. But the wisdom comes when you actively look closely at the gestures and behaviours of the next person. Asking questions like, "Is this compliment necessary? Is this person trying to win my favour by over-extending themselves? Are these gifts necessary? The more you scrutinise such behavioural patterns, the likely you are to see a love bomber from a mile away.

Before you find yourself in manipulated relationships disguised as genuine, intentionally or not, look closely at those close to you and how they act towards you and others. The more the difference in treatment, the more you should interrogate their actions.

There are many pitfalls we all must avoid, and love bombing is one of those that are not usually spoken of, and generally, many people don't see.

You may think you are genuinely loved and cared for while you are being love-bombed and manipulated. The onus is on you to know and see the difference.